Harden Your Heart (one-shot)
by Aldrea Alien
Summary: After getting the included banter with Sera and Solas whilst roaming the Hissing Wastes, I couldn't resist doing this little piece of what was going through Solas' mind.


She barely spoke to him anymore.

It seemed a foolhardy thing to miss, especially as they trudged across the ever-changing sands of the Hissing Wastes. Solas had come to delight in the way her golden eyes lit up whenever he spoke about the Fade. The wonder sparkling there. The unabashed enthusiasm to hear more.

That light was all but extinguished now, muffled with hurt and shame. In the days past, he'd often catch her running her fingers over her forehead and chin, where the swirling lines of the _vallaslin_ that once branded her dark skin. Did she regret asking him to remove them?

He shouldn't have told her the truth behind the markings. It'd been so selfish of him to want her to know. It was all his fault. He shouldn't have led her on, either. Nor should he have kissed her, but those lips, the warmth of her pressed against him. He'd tried so hard to remain distant. _And failed_. Miserably so. His reward? He'd hurt what he wanted to protect.

So he lied. To her. To himself. _In another world_...

He'd told her to do what he'd been unable, to harden her heart, to use her anger at him against Corypheus. Anger she undeniably attempted to keep locked behind a paper-thin mask. But the rare spirit he'd once watch avoid bears and rams with equal care, now harried everything in her path, fire spewing at her command like a high dragon. She _fought_ high dragons. Scoured the land for them. Taunted the beasts as they swooped for the kill.

It was a terrifying and beautiful thing to behold.

And behold he did. Where he thought she would avoid him completely, she still brought him along on every journey, no matter how small. Enforced closeness without recognition. It was her way of punishing him for his actions, he was certain of it. And it hurt to see her so jovial in one breath as she spoke with the others, then cold in the next.

Ahead, another dune loomed before them. They were almost back to the camp where they'd rest before pressing on to Skyhold. Din grunted her frustration and began the climb, the spoils of their recent hunt dragging behind her.

He went to assist, his quickening steps sliding on the treacherous sand. Iron Bull got there first, hoisting the majority of their loot onto his shoulders and laughing at Din's protests.

"So," Sera said, breaking the silence as they trudged behind the pair, "you and the Lady Inquisitor." She smirked. "Interesting."

He turned his head, but not before noting the subtle twitch of Din's shoulders. She'd heard. They could likely hear Sera from the other side of the Fade. "Your interest is not my concern."

"That's all right, because I _meant_ boring." Sera sneered. "The elf always takes the elf so that banging bits will _mean_ something."

Solas cringed from the mental image the woman's crude language imposed on his mind. _Shut up, girl_. Had she gone blind? Did she not see the change in Din's posture? "It is not a topic for discussion," he calmly replied.

"Oh, come on." She nudged him with an elbow. "Drop 'em and rebuild the empire. _Phwoar_!"

Din's back stiffened. She halted on the dune. "Sera! No more!" She didn't face them, but he heard her voice crack.

At his side, Sera rolled her eyes. "Hmph! Fine. Whatever."

"Don't concern yourself, _vhenan_." He said, glaring at Sera. Did the woman not realise what was happening beyond her own wants? "She is… apart from herself." He drew level with Din and halted. Her determined, yet drawn, expression was not one he had expected to be faced with.

"Solas." The quiet tone in which she spoke was unnervingly loud in the night air. "Unless you plan to explain yourself when we get back to Skyhold, I suggest you stop calling me that. I'm clearly not."

_You are_. And he wanted to explain, the very words fought his tongue for release, but he knew what would transpire if he uttered them. He would _not_ do that to her. Not on top of everything else he'd already inflicted. Instead, Solas bowed his head. "As you wish … Inquisitor."

Din nodded slowly and marched on, the silent hulk of the Qunari close behind. He watched them reach the dune's peak where Iron Bull stooped to speak with her. Laughter spilt from her lips, forced and heavy. The false sound halted the instant Sera and himself caught up to the pair and they descended the dune in silence.


End file.
